Thursday, 15 June 2017

Dubai Radio Ads

This is not a radio ad, but only marginally less annoying.

This is Cynthia Dreamy Whingy Breathy Voice. Come to extravagant opulence, indulge in timeless elegance and experience sumptuous flavours from the mystical past of a bygone age. Be the person you always knew you could be, share the finest things the world can present to you on a golden platter bedecked in shinies. Otiose effulgence, pastoral impedance and acrostic tintinnabulation await your very fulfilment in a symphony of exotic flavours and oubliette laden senescence. While away the evening and taste asparagus as you've never tasted it before at Pinglies, the new signature destination from the Wawawoo Resort and Spa in Satwa, the new face of Jumeirah One.

Dynamic Simon? Hi, it's Drippy Pete. How are you?
Hey! I'm Great Pete! Good to see you! And, yes! I'm Dynamic Simon Alright!
I was wondering, Simon. What makes you so much more dynamic than me?
Well, Pete! Good Question! I'm Dynamic because I Brush with Sploid!
Brush? With Sploid? What's that?
It's the New Minty Fresh Breath Oral Health Solution From Organon Labs! Here!
What's this?
Your Own Tube of Sploid to Try Free of Charge!
Free of charge?
Yes! Free Samples are Available From Branches of Plaster Pharmacy!
Wow! I can't wait to try it!
You'll Love It, Pete. Or my Name's not Dynamic Simon!
this ad is regulated by the ministry of health and a baby racoon called dennis and contains no promise of future investments going up or down all situations portrayed are purely hypothetical and do not reflect reality perceived or promised. terms and conditions apply

Did you hear that? That's the sound your back makes when you sit at your laptop every day. Did you know your desk could be killing you? Avoid splayed prostate syndrome and the awful bone crushing side effects of bad posture by sitting on Dr Foster's Orthopedic Cushions. Sweat absorbing, hygienic and available in a range of coruscating colours including Windows 10 wait state blue.

Sorry. I forgot to turn the radio off after the news this morning and ran into the ad break. It was almost over before I realised and switched off.

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