Wednesday, 13 June 2007

NOT The Salik FAQ - Questions About The Dubai Road Toll Dodged Elegantly

Obviously based on a huge amount of entirely unhelpful speculation, here’s the FAQ that answers the questions that the official FAQ doesn’t answer!


What happens if I sell my car?

You have to peel the tag off your windscreen, which damages the tag, so you have to buy a new tag. It might leave some bits of plastic and gucky adhesive on the windscreen, but we can’t be sure yet because we haven’t left a tag stuck to a window in the 55C sun for three months yet. Let alone tried doing that for a couple of years. But we’re sure it’ll be OK. Anyway, why should you care? It’s not your car anymore, is it?

Yes, it’s a Dhs50 car sale tax. Well, Dhs 100 really, ‘cos the bloke that’s buying your car has to get a new tag, too.


Do Salik tags go brown and brittle after a couple of years in the sun like everything else around here (including the people)?

No. Yes. We’re not sure. But they’ll still work, so what’s your problem?


Will they? Really? Work?

Yes.


Sure?

Yyyyyes. Almost. But if they don’t we’ll sort that out.


How?

We just will, alright?


What happens to any available balance on my Salik tag when I sell my car?

Good question. You should really get it refunded, shouldn’t you? The money would logically be held against your Salik account rather than the physical tag. You should call the Salik centre to ‘deactivate the tag’ before you sell your car, according to the official FAQ, but there’s nothing about transferring the balance or anything like that. Interesting one. We’re sure it’ll be sorted out for the best. Really. Trust us.


What happens if a chance stone hits my windscreen and the tag is damanged?

You’re being for real here? Right. You buy a new windscreen and a new tag. Da. Are you asking if that tag can be added to your account or if you just add a new tag to your account? Well, that depends. We’ll basically make up the rules for that one as it happens. OK?


What happens if I don’t have a tag at all?

You mean how are we going to catch you? Not sure. Guess we’ll have to wait and see. Alexander’s money is on a photo-based system, which is going to leave someone combing through an awful lot of number plate photos.


If I drive through the Salik tollgate backwards, do I get a refund?

Nice idea, but I rather doubt it will work, don’t you?


More anon... >:)

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

brilliant. i love it! not far from reality.

Keefieboy said...

imbeSalik

Anonymous said...

Let us take some action to stop salik.
Each of us writes to all our friends , business associates etc etc .
STOP coming to Dubai.

Now each visitor stays in a hotel like JUMAIRAH BEACH HOTEL , buys First class Emirates Air line tickets and in total he spends 10000 DHS.
BUT if we can stop 1000 VISITORS then we are hitting their pockets with 10 Million per day .
We have power to do something so let us do it.
SLOGAN
stop salik or we stop tourism
stop salik or we will crash the dubai property bubble
stop salik or no one will want to visit dubai
WHEN THE MONEY MINDED RTA sees this they will collapse in a month

Alexander said...

Wow. That's a hardcore response!

I'm not sure that bringing down the Dubai property market to save Dhs 8 a day road tolls is, err, scaling the response to the issue! :)

Dubai Property said...

I like you`r response!! Strongly people will change world!)

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