The Bloke In A Pinstripe Suit

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It's always tickled me pink, the idea of the bloke in a pinstripe suit. He'd likely have landed in Abu Dhabi, but I've got him landing in Dubai - possibly even Sharjah. He'd probably have walked down the steps of a Vickers VC10 into the warm air of the Gulf, which would have had him in something of a sweat, although he'd have gone to great lengths to avoid that showing.

He would have gone to the consulate in Dubai for his briefing before going on to the meeting he'd flown here for. By the time he got there, his copy of The Times would have been decidedly sweaty and rumpled. But he would have, of course, remained cool and composed. He was to tell the assembled Sheikhs of the Trucial States that Great Britain's Labour government had decided to cede its colonial role in the administration of all territories east of Suez. They were to have two years to found a nation or whatever it was they wanted to do. But regardless of their decision, the people and government of the United Kingdom were to play no further role in the administration or protection of the Sheikdoms of the Trucial Coast. It was undoubtedly a shameful way to end a close relationship that had spanned well over a hundred years.

I can only imagine the consternation that would have greeted our pebble-glassed visitor's news. The British had long governed the Trucial Coast, providing pretty much all of the tools of administration including defence and foreign policy - defence, at the time, being particularly crucial to the tiny Sheikhdoms that clung to the shores of the Gulf. It was called the Trucial Coast simply because the Sheikhs had all been signatory to the Perpetual Maritime Truce of 1853, following a British campaign to eradicate the endemic maritime piracy in the Gulf. By the end of the century, a further treaty had formalised the British protectorate over the Trucial States.

The bloke in a pinstripe suit would have left a chaotic scene behind him as he headed for the airport. Two years to agree a form of government, write a constitution and build the whole administrative apparatus of a nation state. It was an insane task.

It was made worse by the British government's parliamentary opposition - the Conservatives - who promised they'd reverse the move when they won the election. They lost and their promises came to nothing except wasted time.

Two men were to play a crucial role in the coming two years: the rulers of Abu Dhabi and Dubai respectively - Sheikh Zayed Al Nahyan and Sheikh Rashid Al Maktoum. To this day, Zayed is known to Emiratis as 'Baba Zayed' - the father of the UAE. Both were remarkable men who transitioned from being tribal leaders to the heads of a modern nation state. Alongside them, the rulers of the seven Emirates that made up the Trucial States worked to pull together a single country from a tribal map that looked like a giraffe with measles. Constitutional experts were brought in from Egypt, talks held between rulers not only of the seven trucial emirates, but Oman, Qatar and Bahrain about forming a federation of emirates. A whirlwind of activity started that was to see negotiations about borders and the division of rights and responsibilities from healthcare and education through to foreign policy. Zayed's leadership - and, yes, his deep pockets and ready generosity thanks to Abu Dhabi's oil - were to be critical.

It's hard to imagine how dangerous this period was - there were larger forces all around waiting to fill any vacuum the British left. The tiny new fledgling state faced a precarious start.

But as that frenetic rush to meet the insane deadline commenced, my thoughts are with the bloke in a pinstripe suit, sitting in his VC10 as it banked over the dazzling waters of the Gulf, sipping his English Breakfast Tea and thinking what a colourful bunch of chappies those Sheikhs had been as he headed home to write his memo confirming we had drawn a line under our colonial heritage in the Lower Gulf.

It'd be fun to see his reaction if he came back today. A former colleague of my Father's was amazed to hear I lived in Dubai. He'd served there during the war. "Dubai? What'd you want to live there for? It's just a bunch of mud huts on a creek" he'd exploded.

Quite.

Happy National Day, people. I truly wish you all the very best as you celebrate the 42nd birthday of this nation I have called home for the past twenty years.

PS: If you're interested in exploring the history of the UAE, this here book by Frauke Heard Bey is THE definitive work. It's an expensive buy, but worth every penny.

Abu Dhabi Bans Silly String

(Photo credit: mikecogh)

One of my favourite jokes of all time is that people in Dubai don't understand the Flintstones, while Abu Dhabi do.

Sorry, silly string brought that to mind. And you won't be finding much of it around on December 2nd in Abu Dhabi, because it's been banned - along with 'unofficial' car parades, car painting and a range of other popular national day activities.

The warnings come nice and early, but then reports are already tumbling in about car decoration workshops doing Dhs20,000 makeovers in preparation for the UAE's 42nd National Day which takes place on the aforementioned 2nd December. If Dubai gets Expo 2020, the result due in on November 27th, they're going to completely lose the head all across that weekend.

I've said before that the UAE is the only place in the Middle East where the people take to the streets to celebrate their country, and that they most certainly do. It's a happy time and a time to go wombat crazy and generally make like it's mardi gras, but police around the Emirates have had enough and over the past couple of years have moved to regulate a celebration that at times looks as if it could border on hysteria.

So no changing the colour of your car, obscuring your number plate, having your windscreen tinted with pictures of the UAE's leaders or the flag, no tinting the driver side windows, no hanging out of cars or over-stuffing cars and no, and I'd like to make this quite clear, no silly string.

If you breaks the rules, it's a Dhs1,000 fine and 12 black points. And Abu Dhabi police have set aside a special area for impounded cars on the day. Presumably other emirates' police forces will enforce similar rules, although I haven't seen any announcements.

Sharjah Corniche will doubtless once again be packed and there, I am sure, you will find silly string.

Crazy Apeshit National Day

Image via Wikipedia

It's already clear the United Arab Emirates is going to go crazy apeshit over the 40th National Day. Flags are decorating many of the bigger houses around and the race is on to see who can drape the biggest flag possible on their building. Pennants are fluttering in the warm winter breeze, sparkling lights are festooning hotels, tower blocks and residences and there are a growing number of cars in evidence wrapped in stick-on National Day themed patterns.

It's not even happening for another ten days. UAE National Day takes place on the 2nd December each year, but this year's celebration of forty years of founding of the nation - as well as independence from ze Breets - is clearly going to be very big indeed. Cynics might say the government is pumping things up a little - a touch of patriotic loyalty is only to be encouraged in this year of the 'Arab Spring', but this will be my 18th National Day and I can assure you the nationalistic pride and annual displays of fealty by crowds of UAE Nationals parading, celebrating and generally hooning around going mad with silly string and klaxons are truly heartfelt.

It's going to be interesting to see massive crowds taking to the streets in an Arab country in support of the government and the nation - a unique sight in the Middle East this year, for sure - actually, come to think of it, probably in the world. People all over the place have been taking to the streets to protest governments, from Athens to Oakland we've been feted with images of police pepper-spraying and baton-charging their people. I have to confess at being struck by the incongruity of governments lambasting countries like Syria for attacking protesters at the same time as their own police are beating the crap out of citizens peacefully demonstrating just down the street.

However, even the civil defence folks here in the UAE are undoubtedly preparing for problems - last year's celebrations saw a great many people charging around high as a kite on the excitement of it all and there was even talk of banning the parades because of the risk to life and limb that such a widescale and fervent celebration represented.

It'll be interesting to see whether the fact that the vast majority of UAE Nationals are proud to be Emirati and proud of their leaders comes through in the international coverage of the event, or whether we'll be hearing phrases like 'government sponsored celebrations' that will attempt to give 'balance' to what people on the ground know to be a true, if rare, display of genuine love by a people for their young Arab nation.

(Yes, I know, I'm going soft. And yes, it's a non-writing post. Back to talking about books tomorrow, don't you worry)